day 12 of KIOS...
in honor of Erin who should be here to celebrate her birthday with us today, but isn't.
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
My apologies for mish-moshing the last 5 days of KIOS into this one post, but that's just how life is sometimes now. A mish-mosh. A year ago to the day tomorrow, things took a bit of a turn with my chronic nervous system and immune system stuff. It's not really new as I've dealt with it off and on for 20 years, but this year has been a new rearing of the head of it. And it's a bit unpredictable. Not always sure what I'll wake up like each day. To sum it up for the one sentence prompt, it would be this:
Today was, as life just is now, a mish-mosh of just rolling with it.
Because I woke today very late, after an almost sleepless night, and because I wasn't feel much energy, I found myself sitting in my studio grateful for so many things. First, my hubby Hawk had gotten up long before me, turned on the heat + lights in my studio, and left fresh ice water and hot tea for me there to find when I finally got there. Often when I don't have energy, he does. I'm incredibly grateful for his being in this world, in my world. Anyway, so as I sat here looking at all the bits and bobs, I realized that I could both show you where I blog *and* make it a show + tell of my little hobbit hole studio.
nine of my favorite films, too! I will just add, too, that I did a list of 100 favorites a while back, so these 9 are just a very short peek:
- His Girl Friday
- Enchanted April
- Now Voyager
- Desk Set
- The Fifth Element (bah-dah-boom!)
- Bell, Book + Candle
- Ferris Bueller's Day Off
- Mystic Pizza
- Ocean's 11 (though in the modern re-make the Brad Pitt character eats so much, so often, I get hungry watching it!)
And then while I have the tools I need in my space, you know, computer, digital drawing pad, physical art supplies, and all, well, there are also lots of little sparkly pops of fairy heART-making dust and duds and do-dads everywhere. These things are touchstones to keep me inspired... or centered... or reminded of love. When I hit lulls in my writing or heART-making, my eyes light on these to keep me going. Here are a few of my favs:
The beautiful ADVENTURE ornament in the photo below is from our 2013 Day of the Dead heART trade and was made by Emily Sellers Wilberg. I love it because it reminds me to make an adventure out of my every-single-day being, even when my body won't let me have BIG adventures, you know?
what makes you weepy.
Hard to say what makes me weepy. I love this tear drop from Cath (photo above) because it is actually meant to grow little terrarium plants, you know? So that reminds me that even where there are tears, there is growth if only we will foster and allow it. And, you know, I don't grow actual greens in it because I prefer the skull as a less subtle reminder that in every death and loss that happens in my life, there are weepy times, but also the cracking of my heart -- wide OPEN -- to take in even more of this life while I still am living it.
So what makes me weepy? I don't know. I suppose these days it is those "Gift of the Magi" moments. When I am actually able to do it myself or when I get to witness it in others...those moments when we are willing -- more than willing -- to give up things that are so precious to us, in the name/ love/ for the sake of another. I don't think this planet will be sustainable much longer if we continue down our historically greedy path. I think we have to be willing to give things up...if we want others to thrive. And we may not even see that thriving in our lifetimes...but if we want our grandchildren and their grandchildren to thrive...well, we have to be willing to ... GIVE ... and stop taking. And I get weepy when I see it because it is still so rare.
So there you go. Mish-mosh. Thank you for hanging out with me. Hope you all are finding gentle ways to just BE this holiday season. Sending much love and lots of Reiki...
Friday, December 6, 2013
- So my first Blogger post happened in January 2007, and can be found by clicking here.
- I did actually have other blogish spaces prior to that via platforms I don't think even exist anymore, like LiveJournal (well they might still be around by my account with them isn't) and Vine.
- My posts on art for healing and such actually started back in winter of 1999 with the publication of Mrs. Duck, but the web stuff for it is in such old format that we don't even have it on the servers anymore.
- But there is an ancient archive of the KotaPress Loss Journal issues going back to winter of 2000 still online which you can find here.
The prompt from Kickin' It asks us to share how we've changed or what we've learned since we first posted online. Gawd. That feels impossible to fully answer. I can give bits and pieces of an answer, but the full answer? What's changed? What have I learned since then? E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.M.N.T.H.I.N.G.
I don't know. Here's just a top 5 list, off the cuff, of some of things I've learned:
- Don't fuck with internet haters. If the beasts attack, get a good IT person to help you fix, secure, whatever, and move on. If you try to strike back, those haters turn to demons. We once had a small group of haters on a Usenet group create a fake campaign about us being arrested for child abuse leading to the death of our son (impossible since he died at birth, but whatever) because they didn't like that I was publishing poetry for others and writing about stillbirth online. Or some such thing. It was devastating. And when it first happened, I posted back, tried to get things taken down, tried to counter their bullshit. Waste. Of. Time. They just got more vicious. Let them hate. Fix what you can without engaging. Secure what you can with the help of good technology people. And move on to do yo' thang.
- If you want to be online, your stuff will get stolen. If you don't want your stuff stolen, don't put anything online. My writings and art have been stolen multiple times. Sometimes you can do cease and desist and people will take stuff down. Other times, they don't care, know you'll never find them, and they'll do what they want coz it is the Wild West out here still. I used to get all worked up about it, try to push the river, control the thunder, and demand that mine is mine. Waste. Of. Time. Copyright properly through the Library of Congress. Give your publications ISBNs or ISSNs and register them properly. Keep your stuff as low resolution as possible so that making direct reproductions is a little more difficult. But then just get on with yo' thang. I'm here for the connections and community building...PEOPLE...y'all are the important parts of this for me. The rest of it is all energy vampire.
- Don't discount "virtual" anything. I get people *tsk*tsk*'ing me all the time about virtual connections not being "real" and questioning how I can teach online and feel I'm doing anything honest. People. Loves. Seriously? I can tell you that the connections and communications I have online are not only real, but often intimate, personal, meaningful in ways that could never happen physically because I simply cannot travel to meet everyone in person. All the things that take place in physical groups, take place here. We have to meet each other, build trust, test the ground and footing, push and play and experiment together to create collaborative memories. I can't tell you the number of people I've met who have had grief experiences who say things to me like, "I can't tell the truth about this experience in my real life to anyone." One thing I learned when I worked with Fred Rogers at Mister Rogers Neighborhood was this: it isn't about the tools!!! It's about what you DO with said tools. In Fred's day the emerging technology was TV, and he didn't think it was inherently evil. But we had to make choices as producers about HOW to use that technology. He saw the space between Studio A in WQED and the viewer at home as *sacred ground*. And I have applied all that to the technology of my day. I see the space between me here typing and you there reading as *sacred ground*. REAL things happen on sacred ground.
- The world will never slow down, so stop trying, wishing, hoping it would. If you have a major grief experience, the world seems to go even faster and you feel even slower. Don't dread it. Let it slow. Be still. Hear your breath. Cry as much as you want. Take your time. Grief stuff *always* takes way more time than you -- or anyone else in your life -- thinks it will take. Create your own pace. The pace and priorities of "the world" were never yours anyway -- even if you think you had it all, blah blah blah -- so let it go. You have permission to create and live your very own unique pace, space, and priorities. If you discover you are having some unmet need in the grief experience, stop lamenting our ridiculous world that lacks the ability to meet that need and CREATE a way, a new thing, a new service, a new whatever that will meet your need -- and then share that with others. There will *no doubt* be others with that same unmet need. And wa-la! You just found a new priority. I know that can suck. I know it stinks to have to be your own advocate at the very moment you need the most help you've ever needed, but there it is. Accept it. And figure out how to meet that unmet need and then share the solution/option with others. Grief doesn't happen nor release solo, on our own, in our own bodies. It is a communal, HUMAN experience. Share with others and you are on the road to re-building whatever grief shattered in the first place. I tell you true.
- There will never be a perfect time. There will never be a tidy, bow-wrapped version of you or your life. Being human and alive is a process. There is no end product. Well, except death -- *that* you can count on. But when death gets you, you won't care about anything anymore, so who cares?! But being human and alive is a process. Every mistake is a learning. Every failure tells you more about what you don't want. Every loss makes what's left more meaningful. Stop judging yourself and your life. Stop waiting for the judgment to come in saying you are perfect or this is the *right* time, blah blah. Ain't gonna happen. Get curious instead. What can you do now? What resources do you have now? What did the loss/ mistake/ failure give you? What if you just do one thing right now toward whatever you want/ dream/ vision/ whatever? What would that one thing be? You are disappointed? Okay. So are we all. *AND* what's next? You need rest, time? Take it. Want to throw rocks at the ocean and scream at G-d? Great. Do it. *AND* what's next? It's never going to be perfect. Things won't resolve into beautiful conclusions. There is no right time. There is now. This breath. Whacha wanna do with it? Go do that.
??? As always, everything here is my small, tiny, itty bitty, very subjective view of things. Take what speaks to you. Ignore the rest. And here's to the next breath as long as we each have next breaths to take.
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
"Shut the door. Not that it lets in the cold but that it lets out the cozyness."
-from Mark Twain's Notebooks
Today's post is another combo mixing days 4 + 5 of Kickin' It Old Skool fest...thanks again to Jamie and Shannon for hosting all of us!
So my combo today is: Weathering the 10 Things
It's my attempt to share the weather / climate of my current nesting spot...and to give you the "10 Things About Me" in the same post. And if you can weather all the blather in my 10 Things, then you deserve a prize!
I can start by saying that, for being in the Pacific NW, we are freezing in our nests these last couple days. No bathing for the birdies here today as it was all ice! Maybe the birds got to do a little ice skating instead? :) Just look at the poor Buddha bird bath...oh I think even the stone Buddha is cold in there:
And the mushrooms were falling over,
slain by that icy villain of coooooooooooold
But the interesting thing about making my shivering way out in the world today was this:
- I love blanket houses and pillow forts and small creative spaces. In the past, living in ever-critical judgment of my BEing, I tried to hide that or change it for pushing myself into large spaces, being more extrovert, "growing up," and all that ridiculous stuff of imposition. Now I understand that these soft, small spaces re-energize me. These are the fallows, the nests, the womb spaces where my heART gestates and stews and rest and revives. It isn't childish or anything like that. It is my space of visionary stuff. Blanket houses rule. :) For me anyway :)
- In my time, I've lived in about 10 different cities and visited a handful more. Barring some incredible overseas discovery, it has now dawned on me that I am HOME here on our little island in Puget Sound. No inkling in my bones to have any other place be home base. If, in my time, the big earthquake comes or Mt. Rainier erupts, well then, I'm fine going out of this lifetime that way!
- Between Hawk and I, we have five children. And we have three grandchildren (so far). Three of our sons died at birth. Kota was full term, perfectly healthy pregnancy with birth outcome of death that totally side-swiped us all. Mizuko Star was only 20 weeks along when I went into labor with him. And the third, we only guess was a boy, was a very early miscarriage. Our older two, a son and daughter are adults now, families of their own, and we are incredibly grateful for all the ways they move in this world. And the grandbabies are just scrumptious. And I can't wait to meet the grandbabies who aren't here yet...I'm guessing there are at least a couple more coming eventually!
- I'm vegetarian and fixin' to stay that way for good now. Also gluten free. If I want sweet, I go for maple syrup (organic, only the real stuff) or coconut crystals, and do my very best to stay off the refined crap. I aim for raw and vegan when possible. You know hemp milk, cashew cream, coconut ice...but I do have a hard time giving up on a good organic cheese. I'm also sober, so no alcohol. The last vice? Coffee. And I prefer to read the research that comes out saying coffee is good for us and will plug my ears, "Lalalalalalalalalalalala, I don't hear you," if you try to tell me otherwise.
- I am addicted to art supplies, materials, and gadgets. There, I said it. "Hi, I'm Kara. And I'm an art addict." So sue me. :) Though that is all somewhat curbed these days by the fact that I'm chemically sensitive now, meaning that many things are just not kosher for me to use anymore. But even with that at play, I'm still over the top with art stuff in my studio. Others lust after money, but I tell you truth: art supplies are the only real wealth. HA!
- When I was a kid, I was in choir and show choir. I think even before choir, Barbara Streisand and things like pink toe shoes spoke to my vibrations. I've long held a secret desire to be a Broadway grrrrrrl. And I stink as a singer. And more than one ballet instructor has told me I don't have the body for it. Much to my great disappointment. Even back in the day when I was starving myself and addicted to exercise and speed. Nope. Didn't have it. I did take ballet classes even after I was at Carnegie Mellon, very squarely in the writing program...I took ballet as electives. Yes. That was one of the instructors who told me I was hopeless. :) Le sigh. And the voice stuff, I don't know. I just gave up the hope somewhere along the line and stopped trying. Idina Menzel is probably who I'd most sell my soul to be. :)
- I never know what I'm going to create when I sit down to a blank canvas, journal page, or blob of clay. Even if I have some spark in mind, rarely am I trying to create something specific. I'm more the kind of grrrrrl who starts to play and just gets fascinated with what emerges. Flow with the direction it takes on its own, you know? When I do try to sit down and "draw that apple" or "sculpt a face" or "do that specific henna design" -- well, I fail miserably usually. I'm more of an improv heARTist.
- At one point when I was very little there were two things I saw on TV. Wonder Woman with Linda Carter. And an old Esther Williams movie. I thought, for the *longest* time, that Wonder Woman and the swimming woman were the same woman! I couldn't understand why she would trade singing, dancing, and swimming for an invisible airplane. Bwhahaha!
- I once actually thought you could grow up and be a poet. Done. Bwhahahahahaha! I'm still paying off the student loans for that bill of goods that academia sold me. Seriously, when I get to social security age -- if there is anything left in social security -- I'll never see it because the gov't will just garner it and give it over to the dept of edu toward my student loans. You think I'm joking, don't you? :)
- I often sit in my studio and wonder if it is possible to live your entire life as a beautiful, lovely, slow paced, self determined, dreamy, joyful, simple staycation.
And there you go...if you are reading this, you weathered the 10 Things! For that, you do indeed deserve a prize. And here you go:
Click here to get your free copy of my "STOP stopping yourself"
creative worksheet from the You Have Permission workshop.
Have fun and go play!
creative worksheet from the You Have Permission workshop.
Have fun and go play!
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Today's Kickin' It is an exploration through color! I looooooooooooooooooooove how the prompts use color as the vehicle for inquiry. (I could soooo see adapting this to use as a creative tool for exploring grief experiences. You know, "what's the first thing you think of in your grief experience when you think of red?" That kind of thing!) Anyway, plus today's prompt gave me a reason to dig out these silly holiday light pics I took back in 2010 and then never found a use for using then. FUN! So here goes:
Hot blooded Italian anything!
Closest red thing to you?
A polka dotted kleenex box
What is the last thing that made you angry?
Something that so should not have...something so trivial that it wasn't worth the energy it took to get angry.
Are you a fan of romance?
Of course! My guilt pleasures in the romance area are Diana Gabaldon's books :)
Do you have a temper?
Gawd, yes. Much as I am trying to temper that by using meditation to give me some space between something setting me off and actually setting off!
What's the first thing you think of when you think of green?
The Lucky Charms leprechaun, but he wasn't green was he?
Closest green thing to you?
My surface of my desk is marbled green.
What's your favourite green environment?
Oh the Pacific NW. Can't beat it.
Are you jealous of anyone right now?
You know when I used to grasp at things, the big things, I wanted and all the things I wanted wanted wanted, yes, jealousy came up a lot. Now that my life is different, when jealousy does come up, I use it as a flag to immediately go and do something generous or giving for someone else. Deflates jealousy immediately. Such that, it hardly comes anymore. It's like the instant it comes, I get all gooey with trying to turn my attention to sharing the love for something or someone else with the world. I don't know if that makes any sense at all :)
Are you a lucky person?
Gawd, no. I think I was a horrid dictator in a past life because I'm paying for it this life!
What's the first thing you think of when you think of purple?
Diva time! I may not be lucky in this life, but I like to play Diva in my sparkles and divine purple robe now and again. Hey, I'm a girlie girl. What can I say? :)
Closest purple thing to you?
My watercolor crayon sharpener.
Do you like being treated like royalty?
Of course, didn't you read my answer above about Diva time? :)
Do you like mysterious things?
Oh, that's a harder question. If the mystery is fun, that's one thing. But if there is an ominousness to the mystery, ack, I hate it... I get all anxiety filled and worry. That's no fun! Though I am trying through meditation to get comfortable with ungroundedness and the reality that it is all a mystery, so enjoy the ride.
Are you intuitive?
What's the first thing you think of when you think of blue?
Cool ice or swimming pools. Both lovely!
Closest blue thing to you?
Photo of me in a swimming pool that is on board behind my computer.
Are you good at calming people down?
I try. Helps if I can stay calm myself.
What's your favourite body of water (i.e. lake, ocean, etc)?
Can I just pick all of them?! I'm sooooooo a water baby.
What was the last thing that made you cry?
Seeing our daughter-in-love coming down the aisle for her and our son's wedding a couple weekends ago. So happy for them!
Are you a logical thinker?
What's the first thing you think of when you think of yellow?
The saying, "Yellow and blue make green." ???
Closest yellow thing to you?
A yellow piece of paper on which my husband wrote, "I love u, you woman u!!" :)
What was one of the happiest times of your life?
It's such a long story, but a long while I ago I ran away to California and the addictions that were taking me over instead of staying put with Hawk (my now husband). One day I knew I would die if I stayed on the path of that life. I called Hawk and asked if he'd come get me. The next day I opened my door and there he was with a moving van. Of course I was also pretty darn happy after getting sober and spending the next Christmas with Hawk during which he present me with a huge rose quartz rock (because he knew I was not a diamond ring kind of girl so he got me a different kind of rock), and then asked me to marry him.
What's your favourite holiday?
Winter holidays...not exactly Christmas or Solstice or anything in particular, but just a mix and mingle of all the holidays because of the lights and twinkles and jingly music.
What makes you happy?
Waking up next to Hawk and realizing we have another day together.
What's the first thing you think of when you think of pink?
Closest pink thing to you?
A post it note that says: "Proceed on the hypothesis that cultivating JOY can make you a more ethical and compassionate person."
What sweet things do you like?
Babies with their little baby scent at the top of their heads, you know? Just will never - not even when I'm really really old and decrepit - never, ever will cease wanting to hold them and sniff that scent!
Are you sensitive?
What is your favourite flower?
Oh, too hard to pick. Iris. Orchid. Tulip. Purple roses. Too many.
Do you have a crush on someone?
My Hawk. (And don't tell Hawk, but a little tiny itty bitty stupid teen girl crush on Robert Downey Jr., too.)
What's the first thing you think of when you think of orange?
Mmmmm, dessert. I like fresh orange slices for dessert.
Closest orange thing to you?
Cover of the book, "How To Be Sick: a Buddhist inspired guide for the chronically ill and their caregivers."
Do you dress up for Halloween?
Not really anymore.
What gives you the warm fuzzies?
When Hawk comes up and does one of those wrappy hugs like really squishmishic'ing and I can smell him and hear his heart and oooooooooooooooooooh, just makes me want to evaporate into each other!
What would your superpower be?
What's the first thing you think of when you think of brown?
Grass during drought.
Closest brown thing to you?
Brown bottle of Oil of Oregano...I take drops of it every time I feel a scratch or sniff in the effort to get through the season without getting sick too many time!
What is your favourite type of chocolate?
Dark, raw cacao! My very favorites on the planet come from ChocolaTree in Sedona, but short of that, making my own dark, raw cacao truffles is something I looooooooooooove doing!
What makes you feel grounded?
Ice on the head, warm blankets on the body, dark, quiet room. Works for dealing with migraines, too :)
Paint the wood or always leave it au naturel?
Never never never paint the wood!!! Henna it maybe. But not paint.
What's the first thing you think of when you think of white?
Christmas show tv sets in studio, you know? Like the set of old Bing Crosby specials or the new Glee holiday shows. Or maybe just snow in general...or wedding dresses. :)
Closest white thing to you?
Do you always try to keep the peace?
I try to find peace within myself. Usually, if I can do that, then it reflects outward even if others or the situation is other wise not peaceful.
Do you like to play in the snow?
Awwwww, snow angels. Been years and years.
Are you afraid of going to the doctors or dentist?
Not afraid, but I do hate that we are so hostage to care in the US all dictated by your economic status. You only get what you can afford, not what you need. It just seems cruel. So I rarely engage unless I absolutely have to...and I've done a lot of work with alternative options and learning how to care for ourselves through basics like food.
What's the first thing you think of when you think of black?
Closest black thing to you?
My wacom drawing tablet.
Are you sophisticated or silly?
Pretty goofy actually.
Do you have a lot of secrets?
Not really. I've been sort of unabashedly publishing pretty personal works since high school, so I don't think there's much left to be secret. But I suppose there are a few :)
What's the new black?
Japanese yams. :P No idea. :)
Miracles to you all, lovies!!!
Monday, December 2, 2013
Doing the Kickin' It Old Skool fest, so everyday (or at least when I can catch up!) I'm gonna share on the blog here this month as part of that event. For those of you who are also playing, I'm looking forward to surfing over to your blogs, too. Sharing the season with you is just perfection -- and many thanks to the Ridler sisters for hosting all of us!! Sending all of you gentle vibes via the first heART pic in this post, and then onto the Days 1 and 2 details...
Awwww, I love that we are starting with De-selfies :) I love, too, that Jamie and Shannon encouraged us to do both a look at today, but also a "back in the day" look! I'd have to say my favorite "back in the day" pic is from long before anyone knew what a blog was...talkin' back in the '90s here. Gawd, I'm old. But so here's my THEN:
Capture in a capsule
And then onto Day 2's prompt to share more of the capture in the time capsule! So along with the selfie capturing the visual of NOW, here are a few details of other peeks at what NOW looks like for me:
What are you reading?
Actually, I'm re-reading at the moment. Toni Bernhard has a new book just out that I hope to find in my stocking this holiday, so in the meantime, I'm re-reading her previous book, "How To Be Sick: a Buddhist inspired guide for the chronically ill and their caregivers." Dealing with my own chronic stuff is easier in lots of ways now, but this season seems to come with challenges. So I'm allowing the book to remind me of creative ways to be with my chronic stuff.
And actually, there are a few other books in pile, too...some new reads, some re-reads. I keep a Pin board of quotes that catch me from whatever I'm currently reading. If you want to see more, those are here:
What are you watching?
My watching happens in starts and fits. For a good while recently, I'm working my way through the Art21 series over on PBS:
because I'm obsessed and fascinated with other heARTists and how they work, come up with ideas, layout their studios, and such. But once in a while for total larky do-nada fun, I tune into TV Land and catch old episodes of The Golden Girls and then new episodes of Hot In Cleveland. I think it's hilarious how they are basically the same show...well, in a way. Anyway...
What are you listening to?
Pandora Radio, the Christmas station:
Can't stop. Been listening to it since November 18th and probably won't stop til New Years. :) I don't properly celebrate any particular holiday this season, but the music -- I think because Pandora leans toward the jazz end of the spectrum -- just makes me feel dreamy and soothed and yummy.
What are you loving?
Just the small things and experiences of the every day ilk:
- I miss our three boys who died, but our living daughter is married and has given us three amazing grandbabies now. Our living son just got married a couple of weekends ago, and we hope he and our daughter-in-love will have more grandbaby news for us soon (nothing like pressure from the parents, aye?! Ack! :)).
- I love waking up next to my husband Hawk each day. I know death inside and out, so I know one day we won't wake up next to each other -- that makes every moment now just sooooooo much to savor.
- I love when he makes me tea in the mornings.
- I love juicing and having new food experiences with him.
- I love the holiday lights our housemate put up outside our front windows.
- I love the work I do at The Creative Grief Studio, and thank my lucky stars every single day for Cath, my biz partner and heART partner.
- I love that we live in a place that is less than a mile from "uptown" so I can walk to do anything I want.
- I love my once-a-week (or so) gingerbread hemp milk latte.
- I love that I have a studio space with a door I can close and just make art all night long if I can't sleep.
- I love our little island life. I would be just fine dying here. I don't need those mainland things and bigness stuff I used to long for...I'm happy here. I don't have huge cravings anymore which is so ... ??? freeing? Something.
What are you wearing?
As silly as it is, I love Day of the Dead skellies all year long. So even as we move into this season of light, I'm appreciative of the shadows. Even when I'm all seasonally decked out, I usually have on my skellie scarf.
What are you creating?
I'm actually working on a new "how-to" post for here and for our Creative Studio kit post this year. Here's a little preview:
What are you looking forward to?
Harder question than it used to be. I don't plan a lot now. There are lots of ideas, options, possibilities for how things might go -- or might not go. But I tend to not pin myself to anything in particular anymore because I know how quickly things fall apart. And if I was particularly pinned to some other outcome, then I'm disappointed and must wrestle with reality. So I'm looking forward to the next breath. Maybe. I know a time will come when even that won't come, and that's okay, too. So maybe it's closer to say I'm just looking forward to whatever comes. Adventures while breathing...until that ceases, and who knows? Maybe there are adventures after that, too?? :)
That's that for today's shares. I'll be back each day or every other day or so with more Kickin' It Old Skool. Please feel free to leave comments and point me back toward your blog, too. I'm loooooving the chance to use blogging as a way to create community again!
Miracles to you,
Kara aka MotherHenna
Monday, November 11, 2013
- Become a RAKtavist: http://www.randomactsofkindness.org/raktivists
- Find Kindness Ideas here: http://www.randomactsofkindness.org/kindness-ideas
- Re-member your dead loved ones into community through ideas like this: http://motherhenna.blogspot.com/2012/12/kindnesses-and-other-simple-ways-to-re.html
- Do a marathon on meditation, heART-making, or Reiki for others. See an example of this from Angie over at StillLife: http://stilllifeeveryday.blogspot.com/2011/08/jizopalooza.html
- Have trees planted in the name of your loved ones: http://www2.arborday.org/shopping/donations/orderfire.cfm?TrackingID=619
- Give clean water so those still living can be well: https://www.charitywater.org/donate/
- Send a thank you note to someone you've long been meaning to thank.
- Get on your favorite social media platform and do a whole slew of shares to tell your followers about the work of others! Promote and share the love for other people doing things that inspire you. Spend an entire social media session sharing the love!
- Get in touch with your local food bank and volunteer to help them this season. Either give food or money. Or give your time and be there to stock or ask for donations outside the grocery store. Or ask their staff what they need as they may need something that falls right with your skills in marketing or something.
- Ask another person what they truly need. Stick around to hear their real answer. And then help them get that need met if you can.
Even if grief seems to have swiped your ability to feel joy, allow yourself to see how your kindnesses give joy to others. Feel joy for their joy. Keep meeting others with a sense of loving kindness as you move through the holidaze. Don't be afraid to let others know you are doing kindnesses in the name of the person you love who has died. We are all part of the season -- living and dead -- equally. And allow yourself to move in a way that *knows* there is room for all of us -- and that "room for all of us" comes especially when we are kind and share and really witness one another. You can do it. And the legacy of your dead loved one is worth it! So go for it.
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Maybe it is an occupational hazard of having (very happily) been an only child who looooooved (and still does love) having time alone to play, be with my imagination, to create, and set stages. It made me realize that I have this skill of conjuring or accessing guides even when I'm alone. Now, I've been fortunate the last 17 years to have Hawk present with me in a way I never thought another person could be, and he often has wonderful ideas and reflections as a guide and friend. I'm also lucky to have in person or skype meet-ups with friends like Cath in South Africa or Lynndee on the other side of the island for flesh and blood Creative Council meetings, too. But there are still lots of times in my days when I get to be solo with my only child imagination. And I realize now that when that happens, even alone, I have guides. When/if the time comes that I am truly alone because all I love are dead and gone, and I'm at the mercy of whoever or whatever till death claims me, too -- well, I can honestly say, I know now that the alone-ness of that won't really be alone.
Call it play acting, imagination, batty auntie in the attic, creative coping, resilience, or accessing my most foundational skills learned in my earliest years...whatever. I see now that releasing BOTH the fear of being alone *and* the desire to be alone, allows me to just be with whatever IS in this moment. When this moment brings flesh and blood, it's fabu. When this moment brings tea parties with imaginary friends, it's fabu. Or whatever emerges from between the extremes, fabu. Or maybe even "fabu" is a grasping -- maybe it is closer to say, whatever it is, just IS. And when faced with IS, I deal and do and be and become IS myself.
As habblety-babble as that is, that's the creative prompt I'm sharing today. Who are your flesh and blood Creative Council members? Has it been too long since you connected with them? Then do it now. And in your alone times, take the time to allow your imaginary Guides emerge, too. Get to know or get re-acquainted with them. Doodle them, name them, carve them in clay, whatever you like. Really take the time today to value your skill at building supportive community (in your inner and outer lives), at accessing a life of *inter*dependence. Allow your cast of characters to emerge!
Friday, November 1, 2013
Celebrating Day of the Dead with you!
For me personally, I'm honoring the great-grand and grandparents, along with my three sons, who've all gone before me. I've been spending a lot of time trying to rest into a sense of peace, even in the face of death and grief. So I decided to do a series of Skellie cards that could be strung together in the way you might see prayer or peace flags. The photo below is the result -- and you can click here to see the "how-to" for details about how I made them, too.
|By Kara LC Jones of MotherHenna|
Presenting: The heARTists
|Melissa Ixcheldevi of Spirit Goddess|
|Angie Yingst of The Moon + Stone|
|Rachel Regier of Curlsofred|
|Christine Grothe of Grothe's Cornfields|
|Lola Irizarry at Lola on FB|
|Gemma Manzo of Gemma's House|
|Lynndee LeBeau at LynndeeLeBeau.com|
|Nicci Dot C A of Glitzy Gal|
|Michelle Fave at Rite Here Now|
|By Signe Reda|
|Marline Smallwood of Twig Studio|
|Kelsey Perchinski of Dummaniosa|
|Adrienne Edmonson of Spun Sugar|
|Allison Trundle of AllisonTrundle.com|
|Tracy Arancio of Artrageous Treasures|
|Emily Sellers Wilberg of Stepping Stones|
|Litsa Williams and Eleanor Haley of What's Your Grief|
|Melissa Innocenzi of Never More Place for Art and Life|
If you are looking for ideas for Day of the Dead celebration,
I've got some other posts that you might like:
A bit of background about Days of the Dead:
|Click here to get Day of the Dead themed prints, cards, and more.|
And remember you aren't alone on these days:
|Click here to get print, cards, or stickers of this one.|